what does a postpartum doula do

A Week in Your Life with a Postpartum Doula

What is a postpartum doula?

Choosing to work with a postpartum doula is like giving the family an extra second set of hands, eyes, and ears. We “mother the mother”, making sure her physical, emotional, and social needs are met. We are newborn experts and are happy to care for the baby. We have a wealth of breastfeeding knowledge to share. If there are older children or pets in the home we help shoulder the responsibility of their care, especially while they may not be getting as much attention as they are used to. We help with errands, meal prep, and keeping the house clean. We can also do overnight care so that you can sleep!
If you know you need some extra support, but aren’t sure whether to hire a night nanny, a maid, a babysitter, a meal delivery service, or a lactation specialist… start with a postpartum doula.

Experience One Week with a Postpartum Doula:

It can be hard to explain exactly what postpartum care will look like. Every family has its own needs and priorities. Here is one example, taken from real experiences, of what a week might look like if a postpartum doula was to come to the home each morning:

Hypothetical background:

This sample family’s first baby was born at East Alabama Medical Center the previous week. Both parents were able to be home with her for the rest of the week. Over the weekend family came to help out. On Monday the father had to return to work in Auburn, but the mother felt a little nervous to have the baby by herself and was already tired so we agreed to start postpartum services.

MONDAY:

The doula arrives at the home. The mother is sitting on the couch with a drowsy baby. The doula prepares some quick oatmeal and fills a water bottle and brings them to the mother. They sit and talk for about an hour while the baby sleeps. The mother is weepy, recounting her birth experience in detail. She has several questions about the decisions made and why certain things happened. After talking she feels more confident and content, knowing she made the right choices for her family.

The baby wakes up and is ready to feed. The mother breastfeeds her and the doula helps her improve the baby’s latch slightly, making the process more comfortable for the mother. They discuss what to expect the first few weeks of breastfeeding and strategies for keeping the sleepy baby awake long enough to get full, and how to know she ate enough.

For the last hour, the mom wants nothing more than to shower. The doula holds the baby and takes her on a “tour” of the downstairs, talking to the baby and showing her lights, windows, family photos, etc. The mother decides the shower and alone time feels so good that she turns it into a bath with her postpartum herbal mix.

TUESDAY:

The mother texts the doula before she arrives, inviting the doula to let herself in while the mother and baby continue sleeping. The doula comes in, listens for baby noises, and then does some dishes while they rest. When she hears the baby she goes to get her so that the mother can get a little more sleep after a quick feeding. The doula takes the baby on a stroll around the block in her baby carrier and walks the dog. When they return the mother is sitting in the kitchen enjoying her first hot cup of coffee since the baby was born, feeling refreshed. They talk for a few minutes about priorities for the rest of the week.

The mother wants to catch up on some emails and thank you notes (with her favorite TV drama series in the background) so the doula continues to play with the baby, trying a little tummy time and a lot of snuggles. Before she leaves, the doula makes sure mom has something to eat. A family friend is planning to bring lunch, but the mother admits they are low on groceries. The doula shows the mother how to place a pick-up grocery order for the next morning and arranges for the doula to pick up the groceries on her way to the home the next day. She also adds ingredients for one of her favorite recipes (red lentil taco soup) and plans to make it when needed.

WEDNESDAY:

The doula starts her shift at the grocery store, picking up groceries for the family. When she arrives to the home mom is breastfeeding on the couch. She is excited that some of the techniques they have talked about are working. The father is working from home and stops in to talk for a bit. He also has a lot to process from all of the changes that have taken place, and ends up opening up about how different the experience has been than he expected and how proud of his wife he is. The mother is surprised to hear some of this, as they haven’t had much time to talk. The doula straps the baby into her baby carrier and goes to unload groceries and start making lunch, so that the couple can have some time to talk.

Soon the parents come into the kitchen and suggest giving the baby a bath while they are both home. They haven’t bathed baby since leaving the hospital and are a little nervous. The doula shows them her special “spa technique” for a no-cry bath and stands back and takes pictures on the dad’s phone. Then dad returns to online meetings and mom brings baby to the couch for snuggles while the doula folds some laundry.

THURSDAY:

When the doula arrives the mother is dressed and waiting with the baby. She says she has a chiropractic appointment in Opelika because her tailbone has been bothering her. They agree the doula and baby will come along to the appointment in case the baby needs to breastfeed. The doula walks around the office bouncing the baby while the mother gets adjusted. Afterward baby seems hungry, so the chiropractor offers for the group to use the room long as needed for breastfeeding and the mother takes him up on it, feeding the baby. She has been nervous to nurse in public but feels more confident now that she has tried it without a pillow and outside the comfort of home.

It is clear that getting dressed and out of the house has boosted the mother’s mood, so the doula suggests they sit outside when they return home.They return home and the mother and the baby sit outside enjoying a fall breeze while the doula prepares a simple lunch. She brings it outside and the women talk about all of the changes that have taken place and what to expect in the near future. Time passes quickly and soon the visit is over.

FRIDAY:

The doula arrives and is greeted at the door by the baby’s grandmother who is staying in town for an extended weekend. The mother is sleeping in while grandma watches the baby. Grandma is enamored with the baby and obsessed with doing everything the “right way”. She asks a bunch of questions about newborn care, specifically about changes between the way she cared for her own children and the way the mother is choosing to raise her own. The grandmother is trying to be supportive but has some concerns such as the baby “not being full enough without formula”, or “needing to cry-it-out to strengthen her lungs”. The doula listens to the grandmother’s concerns, then respectfully teaches her about the newborn’s needs and the reasons behind the mother’s parenting methods. The grandmother seems relieved and admits she struggled with feeding her own children and tells the doula she is amazed by how well her daughter is doing – which the doula reminds her to tell her daughter. The grandmother asks how to support the mother better and the doula points out all the ways she has already helped, then makes a few suggestions that have been helpful for other families.

After their conversation, since the grandmother wants to care for the baby, the doula starts a load of laundry and folds another. She leaves the clean basket of folded clothes outside the mother’s door. The grandmother has already cleaned the house so the doula looks for ways to be helpful. She notices some baby gear that needs to be put together. She asks the grandmother about it, and the grandmother explains the dad has been intending to set it up but hasn’t had time yet. So the doula puts a swing and a bouncer together. The mother comes out as the doula is preparing to leave. They exchange a hug and the doula reminds her to text or call if she has questions over the weekend.

Ready to start postpartum support?

If you would like to know how a postpartum doula could best serve your family, please don’t hesitate to reach out! 

Sara Doyle birth postpartum doula (1)

Sarah Doyle. East Alabama's joyful doula.